The Lost World

The National GeoCRAPhic Explorer team has recently made a startling discovery about the existence of an ancient sub-terranean continent. Albee Bach, investigative mythologist and amateur anthro-cum-geo-logist with special degree in industrial psychology and ultra-rational microstatistical logicstix and part of the Nat-G-Crap explorer team, in a really emotionally charged statement said, "Plato was the first to write about an island paradise populated by an advanced civilization. Though he got the address wrong, claiming it to be the ellusive island of Atlantis, its actually something deep down in the bowels of Earth."

Now before you, in a bout of xenophobia, pump a few tonnes of laxative into every visible or not so visible hole on the crust of the earth.. be it manhole or pothole or that A#%@hole round the corner who's always throwing accusative glances at you as if you had introduced his bhains to the business end of a cricket bat (The Meri Bhains ko Danda Kyun Maara syndrome). Damn I forgot what I was saying... ummm yeah don't go pumping in laxative to cleanse the bowels of earth cuz these guys and gals staying down there are really intelligent technoholics.. your cleansing move might backfire and end up leaving you to be scraped off the rear end of some foul smelling planet in the remote reaches of the galaxy. In fact, they are years ahead of any race on the earth's crust when it comes to space travel. Just a small couple of drops in the ocean of their scientific achievements are mentioned below:

Motivated by the fact that the only thing in the Universe that travels faster than light is bad news, these intra-terrestrials constructed a starship powered by bad news. Unfortunately, the ship's drives didn't work terribly well, and, even if they did, their fuel source rendered them incredibly unwelcome, thus defeating the whole point.

Further, long before broadband even peeped upon upper earth, these guys were swarming all over the internet with unthinkable connection speeds. Here's proof (picture courtesy - Google Analytics and h3donist.blogspot.com )

Talking about the literary creativity of these intra-terrestrials, actually the less said the better about that - but I'm still going to say a good bit about it. Their poetry master, Barff the Virulent, is best known for his work "Ode to a Small Lump of Lint I Found in my Belly Button One Midsummer Morning", which caused four listeners to die of internal hemhorraging and forced a fifth to gnaw his own legs off to survive.

National GeoCRAPhic has decided to commemorate themselves by naming this sub-terranean discovery as CRAP-Lantis.